Before the Silence


It was then
That I got so close
To the silence

In the moment when
Everything
Was taken away from me
And it was unlike
Anything
I had expected

For rather than feeling
Bereft
I tasted

The freedom
Of not wanting
Of not waiting

For something
To be different
Than it is right now

The sweet arpeggios
Of love
Rippled through my body

While the world became
My accompaniment
Like a finely tuned orchestra

The idea
That I was incomplete
Was just a belief

Fabricated
To make me grasp
At all manner of things

To prevent
The fear of loss
And ensuing heartache

But this time instead
I mustered the courage
To let all of it go

And upon doing so
I noticed
That the only thing

We ever really let go of
Is the self
We imagine ourselves to be

So after adjusting
My vision
Just a bit

I found myself just being
Without a hint
Of expectation

Knowing
That if I ceased
Holding on

Then maybe
I would be moved by
Life

And if I were
To let myself
Be so empty

Then maybe
The Goddess herself
Would sing through me

Even if only for a moment
Before returning home
To her peaceful source

Like the last lingering notes
Of music
Before tapering off

Into the silence